If you talk to others who have lived the way you've lived and how you've felt about yourself - you'll be shown empathy. We're a social species, so by you sharing your personal issues with others and also listening to others share with you about their personal issues - so they share their feelings about being themselves, this can help you feel better about any personally perceived mistakes you may have made in your life.
Are you usually to harsh on yourself? Here's how not to be.
When you put yourself in others shoes when they tell you about mistakes they think they've made - this should help you to feel the compassion you feel for them - inwards towards yourself.
Unlike shame, compassion is a two-way street.
What will open up a mental escape route for you is empathy that you'll get from others who genuinly understand what you've been through and how you feel.
To help you feel good about looking the way you look and about your personality, you should let your reason part of your brain help you.
Try to always live in your present moment - because that's all that's guaranteed, but by owning your future thoughts this can help you to not regret any of your life's moments.
Try making a list to read every morning - to start your day off well:
1) I'll feel good now in my present moment, by not doing the 2 - 4 below:
2) If I eat what will be fun for a few moments, but I'll fear becoming fat or my sugars will come down so I'll feel very ill.
3) If I cheat on the person I'm with in my life, I'll possibly loose the partner of my dreams and I'll hate myself for what I've done.
4) If I gain weight from eating junk food, I won't want to look at myself in the mirror any more and none of my clothes will fit any more. I'll have to spend a small fortune on getting myself a new wardrobe.
If you read these and you don't like the thought or feelings you get when you read your 2) - 4), look at yourself in the mirror and re: read your no:1 to yourself with a smile on your face and believe that you are in control of you having happiness in your life:
1) I'll feel good now in my present moment! This should help you to really enjoy every time you live in your present moment. You know you can live this way.