Most of us are often trying to be the best at things we do. - so to be perfect at something in our life. Does this sound like you?
No matter what it is that you’re trying to do, you’re trying to be achieving the highest standard possible out of everyone involved. Consider ‘who defines what is perfect about a person and whom do we have to answer to about it?’.
If perfectionism is part of who you are, this may be because a huge part of how you were treated in your childhood wasn’t right or fair. Those suffering with it tend to be wonderful, contributing and effective people, but when they were younger whatever they did just was not good enough.
What is the actual meaning of being perfect? It is: being flawless, satisfying all requirements and always being accurate.
Being perfect isn’t important. You being you, having a go and you making yourself and others happy are important.
Here’s an example for you about perfectionism stemming from poor treatment by a parent.
My dad is a tough cookie, the most intelligent man on Earth, who refuses to be seen to mess up and to get things wrong – not on his watch are those things happening.
He expected me to be the same. I was top of all my classes at school and at dancing, but this just wasn’t good enough for my dad.
My homework would have A*s & 100%s on them and I’d come 1st place in a dance competition, but he would make me do them again until they were even more perfect. I was always knackered because of this.
The only reasons I have confidence in myself these days are because my mum is the exact opposite to my dad, I’ve self-help booked myself a lot and had counseling to help give me hope and success in my efforts. I haven’t seen my dad since I was 12 years and because I’ve received many promotions and pay rises because of my intelligence and good nature with others, plus I have a rather large collection of gold trophies for my sports and my dancing first places.
These days now I’m 41, I can step back from any self doubt I have and say to myself “Laura, you’ve overcome a lot, always worked hard and you’re efforts and work are brilliant – don’t doubt yourself like he did”.
Try to take a step back from any hoo ha! in your life and you decide what and who you want to be and you’ll choose to act how you want to and are more than capable of doing and being.
Once you’ve done this and you start each day by having faith in yourself – watch your happiness and confidence levels grow. You’ll be proud of yourself for the confidence you’ve gained by you living your own ways that fill you with confidence in yourself. Plus you’ll feel rather chuffed about how your life is going.